42 Funny Retirement Slogans


People work their whole lives just so they can spend their latter years in quiet retirement. To celebrate your many decades of devoted service and work to an organization or cause, here are some great retirement slogans that will bring you into your next phase of life. These will offer you some encouragement and humor as you enter into your golden years.

A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.
Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.
Cessation of work is not accompanied by cessation of expenses.
Choose a work that you love and you won’t have to work another day.
Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
Don’t simply retire from something; have something to retire to.
Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.
God’s retirement plan is out of this world.
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
I do wish I could tell you my age but it’s impossible. It keeps changing all the time.
I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.
I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.
I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d be a shortage of fishing poles.
It is better to live rich than to die rich.
It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.
Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing.
Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
Money is something you got to make in case you don’t die.
Not having to worry about money is almost like not having to worry about dying.
Our life, exempt from public haunt, finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks, sermons in stones, and good in everything.
People may live as much retired from the world as they like, but sooner or later they find themselves debtor or creditor to some one.
Retired is being twice tired, I’ve thought first tired of working, then tired of not.
Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.
Retirement is the ugliest word in the language.
Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial.
The afternoon knows what the morning never suspected.
The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.
The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
The money’s no better in retirement but the hours are.
The question isn’t at what age I want to retire, it’s at what income.
The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you’ll grow out of it.
The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.
There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.
To retire is to die.
When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income.
You can be young without money but you can’t be old without it.
You don’t stop laughing when you grow old, you grow old when you stop laughing.
You have to put off being young until you can retire.

Here is an informational packed exchange with Tony Robbins and Inc. Magazine as he discusses how to invest your way into a $70 million dollar retirement.